My wife and I were married for four years. I was still in the Marine Corps, looking at possibly re-enlisting a second time in the next year. We weren’t exactly trying to keep from getting pregnant, but as of yet we hadn’t had any luck. My wife and I thought if we ever got pregnant, we may only end up with one child even though we both wanted more. We just didn’t see it in the cards for us. Then we had my daughter. It was a rough pregnancy, and even tougher birth. My daughter was two weeks late and my wife had to be induced. The induction caused my wife to be in labor for 8 hours, and then finding out my daughters head would not make it past my wifes pelvis. So we opted for a C-Section.

The C-Section went smoothly, even though they jacked up her epidural. My wife can still feel where they injected her to this day, 6 years later. I went out to get some food for her because I knew she had to be starving and hospital food is atrocious. Little did I know, as I was getting a souvenir paper to commemorate my daughters birth, and ordering the Chick-Fil-A, that my wife was hemorrhaging uncontrollably on the table after her C-Section. She had been in labor so long under medication, that her uterus was not clotting like its supposed to after birth. The doctors had to do some extreme pressure on her uterus to get her to stop bleeding.

When I came back, she was flushed because she lost so much blood. She was out of it from all the pain medication and hypotension. As she lay there in the recovery room, with about 8 other women who were recovering from labor, all I could do was lay my daughter on her so she could try and nurse her, or at least get some skin to skin contact to start the bonding process.

After my daughter, we never thought we’d have more children. It was just so hard to have the first one, that we didn’t see that God would ever bless us with more. 6 years later, we have my son and my youngest daughter. My youngest daughter has her own story that I may tell you about some day. She’s my miracle baby. As we have been blessed with three children, things have become quite hectic around here during the days. When we went from two to three children, a friend of mine made the comment that we were going from man to man defense to zone defense. Which is exactly true.

As my wife and I switch days being home with the kids, so we can keep them out of daycare, we hardly have time to get out and do things that don’t involve diapers, baby food, finger foods, or strollers. The stress of going to back to college taking 14-16 hours a semester, keeping three kids alive on days I’m off from school, and only being able to see my wife two days a week really gets to you. Some days I don’t have time to bathe my children, I justify that they didn’t leave the house so I can get away with it. Some days I let the TV babysit them a tad too much as I get things done around the house. Some days I feed them the same thing two meals in a row. If we get pizza one night, look out, thats what we’re eating for another day or two.

There are days where I get frustrated and I can raise my voice when its really not a big deal. Other days I feel bad for getting on to them for silly things that I let them get away with way too much. Sometimes I forget to pray before a meal with them because I’m having to chase down my 1 year old daughter, while my 2 year old son sits in his high chair throwing food, and my 6 year old daughter is asking if she can watch TV while we eat. I may forget to help my daughter with her homework and she doesn’t get the prized sticker at school the next day for making sure her homework was all correct.

Children are a never ending gut check.

I can tell you what I make sure to always do. I always tell my children the truth. Sometimes they aren’t ready for that truth so I have to figure out other ways to say it to them. I always apologize to them when I yell at them or raise my voice without a good reason. I always apologize when I’m wrong. I always tell them what they did wrong and why it was wrong. I always tell them when they do something right or that they did something I’m proud of them for. I always tell them I love them when I leave the house, put them to bed, or drop them off at school. I play with them every chance I get. I read to them. I cuddle with them. I spend individual time with them. I teach them the faith. They know that no matter how bad they may act, that God and Mommy and Daddy love them no matter what. I bless them with holy water and pray with them every night before bed. I make sure they know that our time here on Earth is not our goal, our goal is to get to heaven.

I’m making sure my children are better than I am, and at least I know that I’m getting better at that.